QuotesTemple
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.
Will Rogers
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
Will Rogers
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'
Will Rogers
Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
Will Rogers
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.
Will Rogers
The best way out of a difficulty is through it.
Will Rogers
An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.
Will Rogers
It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
Will Rogers
If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.
Will Rogers
We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business?
Will Rogers
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
Will Rogers
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
Will Rogers
America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.
Will Rogers
The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's one thing about a little education. It spoils you for actual work. The more you know the more you think somebody owes you a living.
Will Rogers
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
Will Rogers
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
Will Rogers
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Will Rogers
So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
Will Rogers
Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
Will Rogers
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
Will Rogers
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Will Rogers
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
Will Rogers
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.
Will Rogers
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
Will Rogers
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Will Rogers
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Will Rogers
Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
Will Rogers
Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
Will Rogers
An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.
Will Rogers
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rogers
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
Will Rogers
When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that's Memoirs.
Will Rogers
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
Will Rogers
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
Will Rogers
Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln.
Will Rogers
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Will Rogers
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Will Rogers
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
Will Rogers
Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
Will Rogers
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
Will Rogers
It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
Will Rogers
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rogers
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
Will Rogers
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
Will Rogers
Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
Will Rogers
Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth.
Will Rogers
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
Will Rogers
People are getting smarter nowadays they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.
Will Rogers
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
Will Rogers
Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
Will Rogers
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Will Rogers
If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
Will Rogers
There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
Will Rogers
A fool and his money are soon elected.
Will Rogers
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
Will Rogers
Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
Will Rogers
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
Will Rogers
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
Will Rogers
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
Will Rogers
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.
Will Rogers
Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.
Will Rogers
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'
Will Rogers
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
Will Rogers
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
Will Rogers
A fool and his money are soon elected.
Will Rogers
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
Will Rogers
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Will Rogers
The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.
Will Rogers
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
Will Rogers
There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.
Will Rogers
Politics is applesauce.
Will Rogers
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
Will Rogers
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Will Rogers
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
Will Rogers
The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.
Will Rogers
The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he's got.
Will Rogers
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Will Rogers
In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.
Will Rogers
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
Will Rogers
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
Will Rogers
You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
Will Rogers
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Will Rogers
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Will Rogers
Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Will Rogers
The United States never lost a war or won a conference.
Will Rogers
Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.
Will Rogers
The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's one thing about a little education. It spoils you for actual work. The more you know the more you think somebody owes you a living.
Will Rogers
Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches.
Will Rogers